A Betrayed Betrayer

There are moments in life where something happens or is said or done to forever change your perspective. These moments are usually so poignant because they come unexpectedly and almost covertly (or sneaky-like, if you will). For me, my perspective on communion will never be the same. I have recently had the opportunity to engage in communion in a couple situations where there was brokenness between me and those with whom I was communing. In the first situation I struggled greatly to sit at the table. How could I commune honestly with someone with whom I had betrayed by my sin and brokenness, and who had betrayed me by theirs? Wouldn't I be staining the Lord's table with my sin if I partook before reconciliation occurred? I shared this struggle with a respected friend, and was surprised by her simple, pointed response to my struggle. "Isn't this what Jesus did?", she gently questioned as I wrestled. Instantly I found myself envisioning the night when the Lord sat with 12 betrayers, broke bread with them, drank from the cup, and then served them by washing their feet. I was overwhelmed by the picture of Jesus supping with His betrayers. And this is why communion, for me, will never be the same. I will no longer go to the table refusing to join in this aspect of Christian fellowship because I have betrayed my brother or sister in Christ or even the Lord Himself. Instead, I will go with humility and gratitude, recognizing that the only One who was ever worthy of the table was Jesus Himself but Who still willingly invited his betrayers to join with Him in intimate fellowship at the table.